How Men and Women shower differently...:)

DrWatson · 2006 December 30

How To Shower Like a Woman

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. Rinse conditioner off hair. Shave armpits and legs. Turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

How To Shower Like a Man

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. Pee. Rinse off and get out of shower. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. Admire wiener size in mirror again. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again. Throw wet towel on bed.

EDIT-TIDE · 2006 December 31

Most ezt igen megmosolyogtam, mokas.

Keszler Mátyás · 2006 December 31

DrWatson írta:
How To Shower Like a Woman

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. Rinse conditioner off hair. Shave armpits and legs. Turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

How To Shower Like a Man

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. Pee. Rinse off and get out of shower. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. Admire wiener size in mirror again. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again. Throw wet towel on bed.

Dear DrWatson If you please magyarul is leirnád? Thanks. Én megértem, de lehet hogy van aki nem.

Ila1 · 2006 December 31

ez az angolul topik Mátyás

Puszedliufo · 2006 December 31

hehehe

Keszler Mátyás · 2007 Január 1

Ila1 írta:
ez az angolul topik Mátyás

Egy év után észrevettem, akkor Dear DrWatson Happy New Year and all the best 1n 2007.:4::4::4::4::4::4::4: and 2000 times more.

SolBadguy · 2007 Január 8

Csak ennyi: "Word of advice: women are impossible to understand, so act before your brain starts getting in the way."

Idézet by Grandia II

Almika · 2007 Január 31

About Carry from Sex and the city

The only thing I've ever successfully made in the kitchen is a mess. And several small fires.
She's blonde

tulipan_hajnal · 2007 Április 1

What do women want?

Many years ago, in <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com

England</ST1

</st1:country-region> there was a castle-town called Camelot. One day Sir Lancelot went out riding on his horse from Camelot. Sir Lancelot was not very smart and so he forgot to take his sword. Suddenly on a narrow path, the Black Knight appeared. The Black Knight was Sir Lancelot’s enemy.
He said, “You have no sword. I could kill you easily now. But I am a playful fellow. So I will give you a question. If you can answer this question, I will not kill you. But you must promise to return here soon.” Sir Lancelot said, “OK, I promise.” The Black Knight then said, “The question is, ‘What do women want most?’”
<O

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Sir Lancelot didn't know the answer. But he had lots of friends back at Camelot and they were always talking about women. He thought surely they would know. So he turned and started riding back to the castle. <O

</O

Suddenly, on the path an ugly old woman jumped out and stopped him. She said, “I heard your conversation with the Black Knight. I know the answer to the question. Find me a husband and I will tell you the answer.” Sir Lancelot felt she was right but said, “Excuse me” and he rode around her and went on to the castle. <O

</O

At the castle he asked all the fellow knights “What do women want most?” They all had different answers, some said chocolate, some said money, some said diamonds, some said “me.” Sir Lancelot was not very smart, but he did have good intuition. His intuition told him these answers were not right. His intuition also told him that the old woman he met on the path really did have the right answer.
<O

</O

Lancelot said to the knights, “The person who I think really knows the answer is an ugly old woman. But she won’t tell me the answer unless I find her a husband. Would any of you marry her?” Immediately all of their heads dropped as if a teacher had asked a difficult question. But one of the knights, Sir Gawain, was a very nice fellow, and he stood up and said, “If it will save your life, I will marry any woman.” So the two of them rode out to the forest. They found the old woman and quickly told her that Sir Gawain would marry her. Then Sir Lancelot said, “Please tell me, What do women want most?”
<O

</O

So there were Sir Lancelot and Sir Gawain in front of the old woman, waiting for an answer to the question, “What do women want most?” The old woman said, “Women want . . . [pause] . . . choice.” Both Sir Lancelot and Sir Gawain were confused by this answer but they accepted it. The old lady and Sir Gawain then went back to Camelot to get married. Sir Lancelot went to meet the Black Knight. “What is the answer?” said the Black Knight. <O

</O

“Ch...ch...ch...choice?” said Sir Lancelot stuttering in fear. <O

</O

“Damn! You got it right. How did you know?” <O

</O

“Oh, I’m just smart,” replied Lancelot.
<O

</O

Then Sir Lancelot rode back to Camelot. The old lady and Sir Gawain had just gotten married and they went up to the wedding room at the top of the castle. The old lady jumped on the bed, and Sir Gawain went to the window to get some fresh air. Suddenly, there was a very sweet breeze that came through the room, and he turned and saw that the old lady had turned into a young beautiful woman. “What happened?” he wondered.
<O

</O

The young lady explained that a wicked witch had put a spell on her, and the only way to break the spell was to marry a knight. Gawain was very excited and started toward the bed, but the young lady said, “Wait, it is not completely over. I can be beautiful like this only half of every day. Do you want me to be beautiful in the day or in the night? The rest of the time I will be that old lady.”
<O

</O

Sir Gawain thought long and hard. He didn't know what to say for the longest time. It was hard to choose between night or day. Finally, he said, “I don’t know, you decide!” And suddenly ZZZAGABOOM! Lightning struck the castle, and the young lady said to Sir Gawain, “You did it! You gave to a woman what she wants most: choice. Now the whole curse is off of me, and I can be beautiful both night and day for as long as I live!”<O

></O

>

xcadx · 2007 Június 10

ha ha nice

BloodyPsycho · 2007 Június 30

he he he he

jordan777 · 2007 November 23

hello there

legalien · 2007 December 5

what!?

slige · 2010 November 5

very funny, thanks for sharing

Szamipapi · 2010 November 17

It's funny. I liked it. The part "Fart and laugh.." was frenetic.. Yep, we are Men, here we are!

boicho · 2011 November 13

boicho · 2011 November 13

Good Lord, this was one of the funniest things I've ever read

FLOUFUN · 2012 Február 3

Yummie

aadni85 · 2013 Január 30

I never do that, that seems like a lot of work for being a woman.

juozasu · 2013 Március 14

Thats not absolute true, about how men take a shower.

How Men and Women shower differently...:)

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